Wow, it's been a long time coming, I have not penned my thoughts in months. Catching up on things in my life, I will give you a short list of areas God has shown me that I need to change. Beginning with the most recent; Pride, I realized last night as I was doing some homework for school that I look down on people whom "I Feel" are not as smart as me. This became apparent when I was reading another students response to a question and the spelling and grammatical errors they made were elementary. I thought to myself, "Why are they even taking college courses when they surely need elementary teaching?"
Course Joking is another area God is giving me lessons on. My wife and I were joking with each other and one of our children was the brunt of the jokes. The child took offense to the joking and got really angry and lashed out at me. The child also stated that we (my wife and I) made them feel like an outsider. That was really painful to hear, as the ones we love the most could be made to feel like they do not belong to the family that God has placed them in.
Humility and how to accept hospitality is a strange concept for me to enjoy. I have now been out of work for almost six months, and the disciples have been very grateful in helping to provide for the needs of my family. I often see that I have a hard time accepting this help because I am not humble enough to see where my family's needs really are. I was praying just two days ago and realized that when I do not let others help our family when we are in need, I am stopping them from their spiritual act of service.
James 4:6 But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble."
~Talk to me~
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Knowledge and insight
Wow, what a time it has been for me this month. I haven't written anything in a while due to wrong motives and a desire to people please. Also, since i started school on the 2nd of March this has added some more responsibility to my plate so I thank you for your patience.
So, here is the skinny on my emotions now and during this time of absence. I have been discouraged because I have never been out of work this long since joining the work force in 1988. I was having trouble believing in Gods promises during this time of testing. I was lying to myself about how I was doing because I wasn't taking time to examine myself. My bible reading was awesome but the heart connection was lacking and so was prayer.
I got some advice and was asked to do something to move Gods heart so I arranged a 10 hour prayer night that really changed things for my walk with God. A lot of folks came to support this effort and it was and continues to be very inspiring. since that night I have been on several job interviews and more continue to come. i also got open about specific sin's in my life that I felt would condemn me if God were to come and take me home for judgment.
I will share what that sin is in person if you are interested. Also my faith was strengthened because I don't have to carry that baggage around any longer. God has and is still working his magic in my heart and life. Thank you for praying for our family and continue to pray for me to see God's will for my life!
Philippians 1:9-11 give me new direction for my life!
~Talk to me~
So, here is the skinny on my emotions now and during this time of absence. I have been discouraged because I have never been out of work this long since joining the work force in 1988. I was having trouble believing in Gods promises during this time of testing. I was lying to myself about how I was doing because I wasn't taking time to examine myself. My bible reading was awesome but the heart connection was lacking and so was prayer.
I got some advice and was asked to do something to move Gods heart so I arranged a 10 hour prayer night that really changed things for my walk with God. A lot of folks came to support this effort and it was and continues to be very inspiring. since that night I have been on several job interviews and more continue to come. i also got open about specific sin's in my life that I felt would condemn me if God were to come and take me home for judgment.
I will share what that sin is in person if you are interested. Also my faith was strengthened because I don't have to carry that baggage around any longer. God has and is still working his magic in my heart and life. Thank you for praying for our family and continue to pray for me to see God's will for my life!
Philippians 1:9-11 give me new direction for my life!
~Talk to me~
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Flawless
How often do I think of God as Flawless? I am poised to think of how often i negate Gods power and majesty when I see his qualities in the bible. God is awesome and deserves the utmost respect from me and I need to always trust that he is righteous and will deliver me no matter what state of life I am in.
Proverbs 30:5 tells me that my refuge should be in God all the time and there is no safer place for me to be. I forget that when I am waking up in the mornings and later in the day when life comes at me. I need to know and be reassured from the scriptures that He is there and all I have to do is reach out to him in prayer and fullness of heart.
God forgive me for not seeing how flawless you are, for forsaking the truth that you are with me always. guide my heart to understand that nothing in this world happens without your hand upon it. Guide my mind to take refuge in you when I feel down or discouraged. Grant me the ability to trust you completely with my life and hold me close to your bosom. May your loving arms protect me and your wisdom guide me.
~Talk to me~
Proverbs 30:5 tells me that my refuge should be in God all the time and there is no safer place for me to be. I forget that when I am waking up in the mornings and later in the day when life comes at me. I need to know and be reassured from the scriptures that He is there and all I have to do is reach out to him in prayer and fullness of heart.
God forgive me for not seeing how flawless you are, for forsaking the truth that you are with me always. guide my heart to understand that nothing in this world happens without your hand upon it. Guide my mind to take refuge in you when I feel down or discouraged. Grant me the ability to trust you completely with my life and hold me close to your bosom. May your loving arms protect me and your wisdom guide me.
~Talk to me~
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Proverbs
There is a them to me for the last two days as I have been reading in the book of Proverbs. Its a hard theme for me to grasp because I don't want to see myself in this light. And that light is "Wicked". In the Proverbs it recounts many times my will takes over and I stop letting God run my life I become my own god and I begin to do things that the Lord doesn't like, and he detests them. Therefore, I become wicked in his eyes and he cant look upon me. Even writing this is hard because I have to take responsibility for my actions and see that I can be unpleasing to the Father in heaven.
God wants me to be pure in heart, meaning the things people cant see on the outside, the internal thoughts, motives and feelings have to be righteous. Often enough I don't think this way unless I dive into the scriptures and find things that work on my character enough to drive me to change. I love God and want to be close to him, I want nothing to be in the way of our relationship and am striving to be more and more like his son who died on the cross for me.
Lord, Listen to your son and guide his life in the ways you want him to go. Help me to lay down my life and make sure that where there are areas of compromise, you take over and expose them and grant me the energy to be honest and wisdom to be righteous. I love you and thank you for choosing me out of darkness to be in the light where the Son shines on me.
~Talk to me~
God wants me to be pure in heart, meaning the things people cant see on the outside, the internal thoughts, motives and feelings have to be righteous. Often enough I don't think this way unless I dive into the scriptures and find things that work on my character enough to drive me to change. I love God and want to be close to him, I want nothing to be in the way of our relationship and am striving to be more and more like his son who died on the cross for me.
Lord, Listen to your son and guide his life in the ways you want him to go. Help me to lay down my life and make sure that where there are areas of compromise, you take over and expose them and grant me the energy to be honest and wisdom to be righteous. I love you and thank you for choosing me out of darkness to be in the light where the Son shines on me.
~Talk to me~
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
WISDOM
In gaining wisdom I often look to the streets to find it, this is an unusual place to go when there are so many false teachings out there. When I refer to the streets I mean the roads I travel everyday, the people I interface with, the conversations I get into and the things I watch. Often enough I make decisions in my life according to the judgements I determined by the things listed above and they have put me in some compromising positions in my life.
The choices I make to stay angry when forgiveness should be at hand, the desire to get my way when I need to lay down my life, the craving to stop helping someone who has little understanding in the lessons of life when others didn't give up on me. These choices help me see that I lack wisdom. Reading the Proverbs this morning helped me see that there are areas of my life where I need to embrace and FIND wisdom.
Wisdom is found when you look for it, Wisdom resides with God and he will give it to me when I seek him out.
Lord help me grow in my wisdom, help me to seek your council, grant me grace when i look to people for answers and not your will. Lord mold me into what you want not what I want.
~Talk to me~
The choices I make to stay angry when forgiveness should be at hand, the desire to get my way when I need to lay down my life, the craving to stop helping someone who has little understanding in the lessons of life when others didn't give up on me. These choices help me see that I lack wisdom. Reading the Proverbs this morning helped me see that there are areas of my life where I need to embrace and FIND wisdom.
Wisdom is found when you look for it, Wisdom resides with God and he will give it to me when I seek him out.
Lord help me grow in my wisdom, help me to seek your council, grant me grace when i look to people for answers and not your will. Lord mold me into what you want not what I want.
~Talk to me~
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Preaching the Word
Finishing the book of Acts this morning has stirred something inside of me to talk about preaching the word. In Acts 28:31 Paul is preaching boldly and without hindrance. The thought came to me about how often I let something hinder me from being bold. I get fearful of peoples reactions especially those studying the bible and then from other disciples who's faith is low that I sense will put up a lot of resistance.
It's hard to say that I have insecurities about being bold for God, but i also know that if I don't mention them i wont get help with them or start the process of healing from them. God doesn't want me to be afraid to speak boldly of him and I shouldn't be that way. I will make a stand and change this in my life.
~Talk to me~
It's hard to say that I have insecurities about being bold for God, but i also know that if I don't mention them i wont get help with them or start the process of healing from them. God doesn't want me to be afraid to speak boldly of him and I shouldn't be that way. I will make a stand and change this in my life.
~Talk to me~
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
In my heart
What a great day to be alive!
God is tremendous to his children and he give us everything we need. This morning i am encouraged to write to you all about a great time in the scriptures. Reading through the book of ACTS it gave me a real heart check and I want to share it with you. Many times I see God working and then there are times when it isn't so easy, But weather I see him or not he is still working.
There are individuals who have given up their lives so that I could have the gospel of Jesus Christ and I am forever grateful. The things that stirred my heart this morning is that, when Stephen was talking to the Sanhedrin about Jesus and he told them they have refused to obey God and turned back in their hearts to Egypt (past) ACTS 7:39. then later in Acts 8:3 how emotions can take over and we do stupid stuff. What a concept huh? I see that i need to accept and Obey Gods truth in my heart and not just on shallow surface things but deep within my heart. I have to search and get inside to see what is holding me back from Obeying God fully.
The to sum it all up ACTS 8:22-23 says that I am full of bitterness and captive to sin! Thanks for the jolt of lightning to my heart GOD! I need the bible everyday to challenge my heart to see the Lord more clearly. I need to understand that if there are areas of my heart that get caught up in deceit and unopeness that I am captive to sin. In my heart i want to be right with the MAKER, and i need everyone to let me know what they see in me and help me to purge them out so that I can be blameless before the Father!
~Talk to me~
God is tremendous to his children and he give us everything we need. This morning i am encouraged to write to you all about a great time in the scriptures. Reading through the book of ACTS it gave me a real heart check and I want to share it with you. Many times I see God working and then there are times when it isn't so easy, But weather I see him or not he is still working.
There are individuals who have given up their lives so that I could have the gospel of Jesus Christ and I am forever grateful. The things that stirred my heart this morning is that, when Stephen was talking to the Sanhedrin about Jesus and he told them they have refused to obey God and turned back in their hearts to Egypt (past) ACTS 7:39. then later in Acts 8:3 how emotions can take over and we do stupid stuff. What a concept huh? I see that i need to accept and Obey Gods truth in my heart and not just on shallow surface things but deep within my heart. I have to search and get inside to see what is holding me back from Obeying God fully.
The to sum it all up ACTS 8:22-23 says that I am full of bitterness and captive to sin! Thanks for the jolt of lightning to my heart GOD! I need the bible everyday to challenge my heart to see the Lord more clearly. I need to understand that if there are areas of my heart that get caught up in deceit and unopeness that I am captive to sin. In my heart i want to be right with the MAKER, and i need everyone to let me know what they see in me and help me to purge them out so that I can be blameless before the Father!
~Talk to me~
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