There is a them to me for the last two days as I have been reading in the book of Proverbs. Its a hard theme for me to grasp because I don't want to see myself in this light. And that light is "Wicked". In the Proverbs it recounts many times my will takes over and I stop letting God run my life I become my own god and I begin to do things that the Lord doesn't like, and he detests them. Therefore, I become wicked in his eyes and he cant look upon me. Even writing this is hard because I have to take responsibility for my actions and see that I can be unpleasing to the Father in heaven.
God wants me to be pure in heart, meaning the things people cant see on the outside, the internal thoughts, motives and feelings have to be righteous. Often enough I don't think this way unless I dive into the scriptures and find things that work on my character enough to drive me to change. I love God and want to be close to him, I want nothing to be in the way of our relationship and am striving to be more and more like his son who died on the cross for me.
Lord, Listen to your son and guide his life in the ways you want him to go. Help me to lay down my life and make sure that where there are areas of compromise, you take over and expose them and grant me the energy to be honest and wisdom to be righteous. I love you and thank you for choosing me out of darkness to be in the light where the Son shines on me.
~Talk to me~
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
WISDOM
In gaining wisdom I often look to the streets to find it, this is an unusual place to go when there are so many false teachings out there. When I refer to the streets I mean the roads I travel everyday, the people I interface with, the conversations I get into and the things I watch. Often enough I make decisions in my life according to the judgements I determined by the things listed above and they have put me in some compromising positions in my life.
The choices I make to stay angry when forgiveness should be at hand, the desire to get my way when I need to lay down my life, the craving to stop helping someone who has little understanding in the lessons of life when others didn't give up on me. These choices help me see that I lack wisdom. Reading the Proverbs this morning helped me see that there are areas of my life where I need to embrace and FIND wisdom.
Wisdom is found when you look for it, Wisdom resides with God and he will give it to me when I seek him out.
Lord help me grow in my wisdom, help me to seek your council, grant me grace when i look to people for answers and not your will. Lord mold me into what you want not what I want.
~Talk to me~
The choices I make to stay angry when forgiveness should be at hand, the desire to get my way when I need to lay down my life, the craving to stop helping someone who has little understanding in the lessons of life when others didn't give up on me. These choices help me see that I lack wisdom. Reading the Proverbs this morning helped me see that there are areas of my life where I need to embrace and FIND wisdom.
Wisdom is found when you look for it, Wisdom resides with God and he will give it to me when I seek him out.
Lord help me grow in my wisdom, help me to seek your council, grant me grace when i look to people for answers and not your will. Lord mold me into what you want not what I want.
~Talk to me~
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Preaching the Word
Finishing the book of Acts this morning has stirred something inside of me to talk about preaching the word. In Acts 28:31 Paul is preaching boldly and without hindrance. The thought came to me about how often I let something hinder me from being bold. I get fearful of peoples reactions especially those studying the bible and then from other disciples who's faith is low that I sense will put up a lot of resistance.
It's hard to say that I have insecurities about being bold for God, but i also know that if I don't mention them i wont get help with them or start the process of healing from them. God doesn't want me to be afraid to speak boldly of him and I shouldn't be that way. I will make a stand and change this in my life.
~Talk to me~
It's hard to say that I have insecurities about being bold for God, but i also know that if I don't mention them i wont get help with them or start the process of healing from them. God doesn't want me to be afraid to speak boldly of him and I shouldn't be that way. I will make a stand and change this in my life.
~Talk to me~
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
In my heart
What a great day to be alive!
God is tremendous to his children and he give us everything we need. This morning i am encouraged to write to you all about a great time in the scriptures. Reading through the book of ACTS it gave me a real heart check and I want to share it with you. Many times I see God working and then there are times when it isn't so easy, But weather I see him or not he is still working.
There are individuals who have given up their lives so that I could have the gospel of Jesus Christ and I am forever grateful. The things that stirred my heart this morning is that, when Stephen was talking to the Sanhedrin about Jesus and he told them they have refused to obey God and turned back in their hearts to Egypt (past) ACTS 7:39. then later in Acts 8:3 how emotions can take over and we do stupid stuff. What a concept huh? I see that i need to accept and Obey Gods truth in my heart and not just on shallow surface things but deep within my heart. I have to search and get inside to see what is holding me back from Obeying God fully.
The to sum it all up ACTS 8:22-23 says that I am full of bitterness and captive to sin! Thanks for the jolt of lightning to my heart GOD! I need the bible everyday to challenge my heart to see the Lord more clearly. I need to understand that if there are areas of my heart that get caught up in deceit and unopeness that I am captive to sin. In my heart i want to be right with the MAKER, and i need everyone to let me know what they see in me and help me to purge them out so that I can be blameless before the Father!
~Talk to me~
God is tremendous to his children and he give us everything we need. This morning i am encouraged to write to you all about a great time in the scriptures. Reading through the book of ACTS it gave me a real heart check and I want to share it with you. Many times I see God working and then there are times when it isn't so easy, But weather I see him or not he is still working.
There are individuals who have given up their lives so that I could have the gospel of Jesus Christ and I am forever grateful. The things that stirred my heart this morning is that, when Stephen was talking to the Sanhedrin about Jesus and he told them they have refused to obey God and turned back in their hearts to Egypt (past) ACTS 7:39. then later in Acts 8:3 how emotions can take over and we do stupid stuff. What a concept huh? I see that i need to accept and Obey Gods truth in my heart and not just on shallow surface things but deep within my heart. I have to search and get inside to see what is holding me back from Obeying God fully.
The to sum it all up ACTS 8:22-23 says that I am full of bitterness and captive to sin! Thanks for the jolt of lightning to my heart GOD! I need the bible everyday to challenge my heart to see the Lord more clearly. I need to understand that if there are areas of my heart that get caught up in deceit and unopeness that I am captive to sin. In my heart i want to be right with the MAKER, and i need everyone to let me know what they see in me and help me to purge them out so that I can be blameless before the Father!
~Talk to me~
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Listen to Him
Take a journey with me to the place where Jesus resides and his words are written (the scriptures). It is a place seldom visited when you think of the world globally. There are pockets of folks believing it and some even practicing what it says. I wonder for myself and for those pockets, how much do we hold in our hearts? Why is it so easy for us to let go of the truth that is in his powerful words?
Jesus walked the earth and was God in the flesh. he never sinned and he always looked out for the best in people and never did anything to harm them. Thinking about myself, Jesus never tells me anything that will hurt me, he never will give me bad advice nor put me in circumstances that will endanger me. He gives me words of wisdom and words of insight that train me to think in a manner different of the people that are around me daily that don't know him. Jesus is the man in my life that guides me to making many decisions and life changes that help me to turn me away from danger.
John 18:37 (New International Version)
37"You are a king, then!" said Pilate. Jesus answered, "You are right in saying I am a king. In fact, for this reason I was born, and for this I came into the world, to testify to the truth. Everyone on the side of truth listens to me."
If i am on Jesus' side, how is it that I don't want to listen to his every command, decree, input story, or Truth? my flesh wants to fight against believing that he looks out for me and I have to constantly fight Satan and the thoughts he puts into my head that say Jesus wont do what he says he will do. Jesus knows me and my heart and he knows that without a doubt that I want to serve him wholeheartedly.
God help me to serve you and your son WHOLEHEARTEDLY!
~Talk to me~
Jesus walked the earth and was God in the flesh. he never sinned and he always looked out for the best in people and never did anything to harm them. Thinking about myself, Jesus never tells me anything that will hurt me, he never will give me bad advice nor put me in circumstances that will endanger me. He gives me words of wisdom and words of insight that train me to think in a manner different of the people that are around me daily that don't know him. Jesus is the man in my life that guides me to making many decisions and life changes that help me to turn me away from danger.
John 18:37 (New International Version)
37"You are a king, then!" said Pilate. Jesus answered, "You are right in saying I am a king. In fact, for this reason I was born, and for this I came into the world, to testify to the truth. Everyone on the side of truth listens to me."
If i am on Jesus' side, how is it that I don't want to listen to his every command, decree, input story, or Truth? my flesh wants to fight against believing that he looks out for me and I have to constantly fight Satan and the thoughts he puts into my head that say Jesus wont do what he says he will do. Jesus knows me and my heart and he knows that without a doubt that I want to serve him wholeheartedly.
God help me to serve you and your son WHOLEHEARTEDLY!
~Talk to me~
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
The MAN
Gotta tell you, our God is awesome. I just listened to Sundays message and got so much out of it. I see that God in his wonder has given me friends that are willing to help me see him so much clearer than I can on my own. God loves me and will take care of me in his time and I have to remember that. He also has friends to direct us in his word when we feel low.
I was really excited Friday to have the interview and i was supposed to hear something yesterday and the anticipation was getting to me and I called the manager and he hadn't had a chance to talk to the other parties he needed to and he said that he'd get back to me but hasn't yet. So this morning i woke up and all day yesterday I was and am waiting to hear something from him. I see that my anxieties are getting to me and that I need to wait on him. It's also frustrating that as I'm having my time with God that the kids are up way too early and I'm feeling interrupted and angry about that (trying to tune them out) but i know that's not the heart to have.
My attitude has to change and understand that, kids are a gift and i need to Cherish them and love them and respect them which is not always easy. I have an enormous emotional area inside of me that i need to gain more control over or it will dominate my life. I need God's wisdom and mercy when my emotions begin to take over. Pray for me to gain his understanding and his ways in my life.
I hope to hear something from the interview but it's in Gods time and not mine I just have to trust that he knows what i need and his blessings will be great. Thanks for listening
Psalms 25 is where I'm gaining strength today!
~Talk to me~
I was really excited Friday to have the interview and i was supposed to hear something yesterday and the anticipation was getting to me and I called the manager and he hadn't had a chance to talk to the other parties he needed to and he said that he'd get back to me but hasn't yet. So this morning i woke up and all day yesterday I was and am waiting to hear something from him. I see that my anxieties are getting to me and that I need to wait on him. It's also frustrating that as I'm having my time with God that the kids are up way too early and I'm feeling interrupted and angry about that (trying to tune them out) but i know that's not the heart to have.
My attitude has to change and understand that, kids are a gift and i need to Cherish them and love them and respect them which is not always easy. I have an enormous emotional area inside of me that i need to gain more control over or it will dominate my life. I need God's wisdom and mercy when my emotions begin to take over. Pray for me to gain his understanding and his ways in my life.
I hope to hear something from the interview but it's in Gods time and not mine I just have to trust that he knows what i need and his blessings will be great. Thanks for listening
Psalms 25 is where I'm gaining strength today!
~Talk to me~
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
The crunch
Waking up today I felt pretty good, I accomplished a few things yesterday job hunting wise and I made some pretty good contacts. I sent out a dozen or so resumes and came home and refined some searches for career changes. But while reading the Scriptures and feeling pretty good my wife tells me that my daughter cant go to school because of an ear ache and a soar throat, then ask if we have enough money to take her to the hospital to get looked at. Another reminder of why its important for me to find a job.
Three of our four kids are sick, my wife is sick and I am struggling emotionally from all the things that are taking place this morning. then I asked my wife if we could apply for medicare and there was an attitude from her and I asked why the attitude and she said that she felt that I had one. This is crazy, and something that wouldn't really bother me if I was working because we could take her to the doctor and not have to worry about a ton of money going out, we could get them medicine without a thousand dollar co-pay (exaggeration). I really need to go pray about these thing!
The scriptures tell me this morning that God is faithful (2 Timothy 2:13) also that Paul went through a lot of persecutions and sufferings and so do I. I have to go through them so that my faith will increase in the Lord
Three of our four kids are sick, my wife is sick and I am struggling emotionally from all the things that are taking place this morning. then I asked my wife if we could apply for medicare and there was an attitude from her and I asked why the attitude and she said that she felt that I had one. This is crazy, and something that wouldn't really bother me if I was working because we could take her to the doctor and not have to worry about a ton of money going out, we could get them medicine without a thousand dollar co-pay (exaggeration). I really need to go pray about these thing!
The scriptures tell me this morning that God is faithful (2 Timothy 2:13) also that Paul went through a lot of persecutions and sufferings and so do I. I have to go through them so that my faith will increase in the Lord
2 Timothy 3:10-15 (New International Version)
You, however, know all about my teaching, my way of life, my purpose, faith, patience, love, endurance, persecutions, sufferings—what kinds of things happened to me in Antioch, Iconium and Lystra, the persecutions I endured. Yet the Lord rescued me from all of them. In fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted, while evil men and impostors will go from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived. But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.
You, however, know all about my teaching, my way of life, my purpose, faith, patience, love, endurance, persecutions, sufferings—what kinds of things happened to me in Antioch, Iconium and Lystra, the persecutions I endured. Yet the Lord rescued me from all of them. In fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted, while evil men and impostors will go from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived. But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.
I want to be wise in Christ.
~Talk to me~
Monday, February 2, 2009
Quality of life
Super Sunday is over and Monday is here and so are the thoughts of hunting for a job all over again. While the unsureity of gaining a job today is swimming around in my head there is something else stirring, the desire to be devoted to the scriptures. I needed something to ground me today and help me stay focused as is see little money coming in and a test of faith ever in front. My kids are sick and I didn't sleep very well and I could sense that I would be cranky this morning when they wake up.
I love reading the bible because it helps me understand that in these troubling times and my uncertain life, God is always there to help me see glimpses of his plan. Today i see that no matter what is happening I have to stick to the truth's of a life with God and aspire to maintain/ gain these qualities:
1 Timothy 3:8-10 (New International Version)
Deacons, likewise, are to be men worthy of respect, sincere, not indulging in much wine, and not pursuing dishonest gain. They must keep hold of the deep truths of the faith with a clear conscience. They must first be tested; and then if there is nothing against them, let them serve as deacons.
I want these qualities to ring true in all areas of my life and I need everyone's help in obtaining them. The qualities come with testing and (I feel like I'm being tested) and with perseverance. The quality that speaks the most truth to me today and for the past few weeks is "Not pursuing dishonest gain". Its hard not to think about things in my past when I had no conscience about people or their feelings and all I wanted was to preserve myself and my lifestyle. dishonest gain was a continual outreach in my life.
Today please pray for me to seek HONEST employment and HONEST work that I may be a leader of my family and an inspiration to all those who read this blog. I'm going down to PG&E this morning (possible career change) to see if they will hire me as i was informed that they are hiring some installers. This is honest work and may possibly bring income to my family.
~Talk to me~
I love reading the bible because it helps me understand that in these troubling times and my uncertain life, God is always there to help me see glimpses of his plan. Today i see that no matter what is happening I have to stick to the truth's of a life with God and aspire to maintain/ gain these qualities:
1 Timothy 3:8-10 (New International Version)
Deacons, likewise, are to be men worthy of respect, sincere, not indulging in much wine, and not pursuing dishonest gain. They must keep hold of the deep truths of the faith with a clear conscience. They must first be tested; and then if there is nothing against them, let them serve as deacons.
I want these qualities to ring true in all areas of my life and I need everyone's help in obtaining them. The qualities come with testing and (I feel like I'm being tested) and with perseverance. The quality that speaks the most truth to me today and for the past few weeks is "Not pursuing dishonest gain". Its hard not to think about things in my past when I had no conscience about people or their feelings and all I wanted was to preserve myself and my lifestyle. dishonest gain was a continual outreach in my life.
Today please pray for me to seek HONEST employment and HONEST work that I may be a leader of my family and an inspiration to all those who read this blog. I'm going down to PG&E this morning (possible career change) to see if they will hire me as i was informed that they are hiring some installers. This is honest work and may possibly bring income to my family.
~Talk to me~
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