I often read in the bible how one of my favorite writers "Paul" talks to the church's he writes too, to devote them selves to Prayer. I find this morning, my personal life is not a devotion to prayer. I use prayer as a way to talk to God but the initial connection only last a short while. Something I see is that I need to understand what devoted means and how that applies to my life.
After looking up the word I think of how when people die and someone may say "they devoted their lives to this" and it gives me the understanding that people know what they do/did that distinguished their lives and people around them understood that no matter what happened to them in life, they never gave up on the research on discovering something.
Now compare that with my life...do others know how much I pray? Will others think of me as a person devoted to prayer? Sure as I'm writing this I want to Pray...LOL, but seriously when i speak how often do the words i speak to someone include "I prayed for this or that situation or thing"? then if i say them am i telling the truth? Or is it just words to appease the listener as to justify my duties as a Disciple?
I know in my heart that I have to change this aspect of life and become a person devoted to prayer as the scriptures call me too!
Colossians 4:2-6
Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains. Pray that I may proclaim it clearly, as I should. Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.
P.S. Anyone reading should be able to comment on the blog with out having to set up an account.
~Talk to me~
Friday, January 30, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
My Father
Dad,
Thank you for everything that you have given me, thank you for life, the ability to walk , talk, read, speak, learn, have relationships, have children. thank you for your scriptures that guide me, thank you for my wife, my friends, my home, my church, my ability to express the joy i have for you. Thank you for letting me live to see another day, thank you for this blog that helps me get in touch with what I'm feeling inside. Thank you for calling me out of darkness into you wonderful light. Thanks for blessing me in all the ways you have this far. Thank you for the Y workers who help with my children, thank you for giving me a heart to be open with my feelings.
Father, I don't know your plans for me but I hope that I can live them out just as you desire, I get scared at times when things aren't going the way i want them too and I get anxious because i want to work faster than you have planned. Grant me the faith to wait on you. You have blessed me in so many ways but yet I don't trust you all the time. Help me with my unbelief and my faith to wait on you. Lord I'm asking you to Deliver me from the turmoil in my mind that grips me with fear. Help me see that my thinking is mostly my pride and that I can trust that just as the scriptures say " look at the birds of the air they do not sow or reap or stow away in barns, yet you feed them" that you will continue to feed me.
Lord I have a lot of thoughts that Satan is putting in my head and I'm ASKING this morning that you block his efforts to sift me. Block his powers in the world today as I go out and glorify you. Father I ask that you forgive me of my sins and deliver me from the temptations that come my way. Transform my mind today to think of heavenly things and not worldly things.
God I love you and need you in my life. Bless me!
P.S. I want the Job you have planned for me, please make it clear what that is!
~Talk to me~
Thank you for everything that you have given me, thank you for life, the ability to walk , talk, read, speak, learn, have relationships, have children. thank you for your scriptures that guide me, thank you for my wife, my friends, my home, my church, my ability to express the joy i have for you. Thank you for letting me live to see another day, thank you for this blog that helps me get in touch with what I'm feeling inside. Thank you for calling me out of darkness into you wonderful light. Thanks for blessing me in all the ways you have this far. Thank you for the Y workers who help with my children, thank you for giving me a heart to be open with my feelings.
Father, I don't know your plans for me but I hope that I can live them out just as you desire, I get scared at times when things aren't going the way i want them too and I get anxious because i want to work faster than you have planned. Grant me the faith to wait on you. You have blessed me in so many ways but yet I don't trust you all the time. Help me with my unbelief and my faith to wait on you. Lord I'm asking you to Deliver me from the turmoil in my mind that grips me with fear. Help me see that my thinking is mostly my pride and that I can trust that just as the scriptures say " look at the birds of the air they do not sow or reap or stow away in barns, yet you feed them" that you will continue to feed me.
Lord I have a lot of thoughts that Satan is putting in my head and I'm ASKING this morning that you block his efforts to sift me. Block his powers in the world today as I go out and glorify you. Father I ask that you forgive me of my sins and deliver me from the temptations that come my way. Transform my mind today to think of heavenly things and not worldly things.
God I love you and need you in my life. Bless me!
P.S. I want the Job you have planned for me, please make it clear what that is!
~Talk to me~
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
God is with ME!
What a concept! What a thought! No what a reality, God is with me always. I was reading and writing this morning on how god is with me in various areas of my life that I don't always acknowledge and it prompted me to think of more areas. Then i really got to thinking...WOW God is with me all the time even when I am not aware of his presence he is still there!
He's with my thoughts, my heart, my marriage, my children, my family, my health, my finances, my fruitfulness, my relationships, my ministry, my schedule and many other things. he told me in the scripture: "And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." but this morning I had to look at this again and see if I believe this.
Its not easy to think that I don't Give God the respect that he deserves when he says that i am with you always that he means it. I will be exploring other areas of my life to make sure that I keep this in front of me in all my interactions and dealings through the day!
I want to make this a habit of knowing that in every situation he is there. When I'm going to sleep, walking on the road, getting angry, feeling sad, when my kids are running around crazily, when things aren't going the way I want, when times are good, when I'm smiling, when I'm speaking, when I'm praying HE'S there!
Hebrews 13:4-6 Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"
~Talk to me~
He's with my thoughts, my heart, my marriage, my children, my family, my health, my finances, my fruitfulness, my relationships, my ministry, my schedule and many other things. he told me in the scripture: "And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." but this morning I had to look at this again and see if I believe this.
Its not easy to think that I don't Give God the respect that he deserves when he says that i am with you always that he means it. I will be exploring other areas of my life to make sure that I keep this in front of me in all my interactions and dealings through the day!
I want to make this a habit of knowing that in every situation he is there. When I'm going to sleep, walking on the road, getting angry, feeling sad, when my kids are running around crazily, when things aren't going the way I want, when times are good, when I'm smiling, when I'm speaking, when I'm praying HE'S there!
Hebrews 13:4-6 Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"
~Talk to me~
Monday, January 26, 2009
Trials and Temptations
James 1 1-8 (message)
I, James, am a slave of God and the Master Jesus, writing to the twelve tribes scattered to Kingdom Come: Hello! Faith Under Pressure
Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.
If you don't know what you're doing, pray to the Father. He loves to help. You'll get his help, and won't be condescended to when you ask for it. Ask boldly, believingly, without a second thought. People who "worry their prayers" are like wind-whipped waves. Don't think you're going to get anything from the Master that way, adrift at sea, keeping all your options open.
Yesterdays sermon gave me some great hope. It produced a longing inside me to truly seek after my feelings and thoughts about how I trust the God I serve and the truth i long to live in. What really stirred inside me was "Fear makes you unstable" and if I'm unstable it has repercussions on those around me that I lead "my family". I have to have faith that is rooted in the scriptures and not on my feelings. I have to believe everything in the bible just as if I were blessed enough to help someone who doesn't know God to trust the scriptures.
Getting older as a disciple of Jesus it becomes easier to assume that things will go easy for me and that life's challenges wont be that bad because I try diligently to hold to the teachings. But God sees everything, even the junk that I can't and EXPOSES them in various ways. I love God and the Bible and all my faithful brothers and sisters. I am asking for your help and for you love in these moments. Pray for my family and I to hold on to Gods promises and for us to have humility and see how God protects us while we are being REFINED!
~Talk to me~
I, James, am a slave of God and the Master Jesus, writing to the twelve tribes scattered to Kingdom Come: Hello! Faith Under Pressure
Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.
If you don't know what you're doing, pray to the Father. He loves to help. You'll get his help, and won't be condescended to when you ask for it. Ask boldly, believingly, without a second thought. People who "worry their prayers" are like wind-whipped waves. Don't think you're going to get anything from the Master that way, adrift at sea, keeping all your options open.
Yesterdays sermon gave me some great hope. It produced a longing inside me to truly seek after my feelings and thoughts about how I trust the God I serve and the truth i long to live in. What really stirred inside me was "Fear makes you unstable" and if I'm unstable it has repercussions on those around me that I lead "my family". I have to have faith that is rooted in the scriptures and not on my feelings. I have to believe everything in the bible just as if I were blessed enough to help someone who doesn't know God to trust the scriptures.
Getting older as a disciple of Jesus it becomes easier to assume that things will go easy for me and that life's challenges wont be that bad because I try diligently to hold to the teachings. But God sees everything, even the junk that I can't and EXPOSES them in various ways. I love God and the Bible and all my faithful brothers and sisters. I am asking for your help and for you love in these moments. Pray for my family and I to hold on to Gods promises and for us to have humility and see how God protects us while we are being REFINED!
~Talk to me~
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
{What's inside?}
It's been a rough weekend for me. I have to give a little background for clarity and understanding into what I am talking about. It has been a challenging time in my home, I'd reached the wall, I cursed and been a brute beast to my oldest son. There was a lot of lying and disrespect directed at my wife from him and then toward me. As I tried to talk rationally, and the lies kept coming I began transforming. All this accompanied with little to no prayer about what I'm feeling at that time.
During my last rant on Sunday after a great service, I got so upset at him for not doing his chores but wanting to go play outside with his friends. i asked him several times in a calm manner to do them but each time his body language and attitude (verbally) began launching me again into this beast. My wife did a great job at talking to the Beast and helping me reflect on what I was doing to the family and how as I value relationships, I was DESTROYING the very ones I value the most, my Family! As I looked at myself I saw the Demon (Legion) at the tomb and how puffed up and scary that man was. I also thought of the scripture (after calming down) Proverbs 29:11A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control. In that moment, Gods plan started to unravel in my life.
I thought about the Damage I caused and immediately asked God to forgive me and then my family. I apologized to my son and gave him a big hug and we cried on each others shoulder as we began accepting our responsibility for the mistreatment of each other. Then I asked my wife to forgive me and she did as well. Later that evening I was open with our Leadership group up here and got and still receiving a lot of discipling that is giving me understanding and clarity on how I have to go deeper in my bible study and prayers to GOD. I didn't understand all my actions and rants (fits of rage) at the time they were happening but i do see the progression and how it got there, now I'm on a journey to rid myself of the beast within.
It starts with openness, James 5:16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
This got rid of my pride and helped me be humble, then I was faced with not getting proud again and receiving the feedback from the group and accepting it! Attentively listening to the love being shown to me was awesome. god has called me out of darkness into his light and when it shines I cant help but to bask in it.
What stands out the most is that i have to search myself and continue to dig out exactly what I'm feeling and not being afraid to talk about those things. I also have to find my way in the scriptures to see the lesson God is trying to teach me at this junction in my life.
Here is today: Isaiah 40: 28 Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
I need my wings and red bull won't give me them LOL.
~Talk to me~
During my last rant on Sunday after a great service, I got so upset at him for not doing his chores but wanting to go play outside with his friends. i asked him several times in a calm manner to do them but each time his body language and attitude (verbally) began launching me again into this beast. My wife did a great job at talking to the Beast and helping me reflect on what I was doing to the family and how as I value relationships, I was DESTROYING the very ones I value the most, my Family! As I looked at myself I saw the Demon (Legion) at the tomb and how puffed up and scary that man was. I also thought of the scripture (after calming down) Proverbs 29:11A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control. In that moment, Gods plan started to unravel in my life.
I thought about the Damage I caused and immediately asked God to forgive me and then my family. I apologized to my son and gave him a big hug and we cried on each others shoulder as we began accepting our responsibility for the mistreatment of each other. Then I asked my wife to forgive me and she did as well. Later that evening I was open with our Leadership group up here and got and still receiving a lot of discipling that is giving me understanding and clarity on how I have to go deeper in my bible study and prayers to GOD. I didn't understand all my actions and rants (fits of rage) at the time they were happening but i do see the progression and how it got there, now I'm on a journey to rid myself of the beast within.
It starts with openness, James 5:16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
This got rid of my pride and helped me be humble, then I was faced with not getting proud again and receiving the feedback from the group and accepting it! Attentively listening to the love being shown to me was awesome. god has called me out of darkness into his light and when it shines I cant help but to bask in it.
What stands out the most is that i have to search myself and continue to dig out exactly what I'm feeling and not being afraid to talk about those things. I also have to find my way in the scriptures to see the lesson God is trying to teach me at this junction in my life.
Here is today: Isaiah 40: 28 Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
I need my wings and red bull won't give me them LOL.
~Talk to me~
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Patience
I am gripped this morning with thoughts running through my head. About things coming up and things presently going on and the job hunting and where the money is coming from and just a bunch of worries. Not that I'm thinking about all of them at the same time but that they are swimming around. It was hard at first to focus on reading today as the kids got up right a 6:15am as the coffee was brewing. so i took care of them and got my coffee and thought some more, checked email and got rid of some of the distractions in my mind so i could begin to focus on the scriptures.
Glad that I did that, because God showed me something special. A prelude to what I want to share today is that I am a fan of a TV show called the First 48. It is a detective show that catches homicide suspects sometimes within 48 hours after they commit the crime. As I was watching it last night something profound came to me. One thing that law enforcement individuals use in catching their suspects is PATIENCE! While they are putting things together in such a short time they still use patience in processing clues, gathering profiles, talking to individuals on the team and waiting for the potential suspect to turn him/herself in.
I have been out of work at 2pm today, one week not a long time but I see me not being Patience. God has something big planned for me and he will deliver it at the right time so that when it comes I am ready to receive it. I have work to do in the mean time, I have to gather the clues, do some investigating, talk to team members (wife and other disciples), process information as it comes in and then WAIT for Gods plan to happen. I also see that my weakness is patience, I want things to happen when I want them to and not when God wants them too. So here is what' exciting:
Matthew 21:21-22 (New International Version)
21Jesus replied, "I tell you the truth, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and it will be done. 22If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer."
In waiting on the Lord, I have to continue to be in Prayer. The scriptures are so plan that I can overlook them often. I forget some fundamental truths about them and how encouraging they are when I read them.
~Talk to me~
Glad that I did that, because God showed me something special. A prelude to what I want to share today is that I am a fan of a TV show called the First 48. It is a detective show that catches homicide suspects sometimes within 48 hours after they commit the crime. As I was watching it last night something profound came to me. One thing that law enforcement individuals use in catching their suspects is PATIENCE! While they are putting things together in such a short time they still use patience in processing clues, gathering profiles, talking to individuals on the team and waiting for the potential suspect to turn him/herself in.
I have been out of work at 2pm today, one week not a long time but I see me not being Patience. God has something big planned for me and he will deliver it at the right time so that when it comes I am ready to receive it. I have work to do in the mean time, I have to gather the clues, do some investigating, talk to team members (wife and other disciples), process information as it comes in and then WAIT for Gods plan to happen. I also see that my weakness is patience, I want things to happen when I want them to and not when God wants them too. So here is what' exciting:
Matthew 21:21-22 (New International Version)
21Jesus replied, "I tell you the truth, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and it will be done. 22If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer."
In waiting on the Lord, I have to continue to be in Prayer. The scriptures are so plan that I can overlook them often. I forget some fundamental truths about them and how encouraging they are when I read them.
~Talk to me~
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Workers
I didn't expect to be hit by this today but the scriptures are profoundly amazing. Jesus is the master at giving insight to life and understanding. When we read his words we gain knowledge and we also have to take that knowledge and begin to examine ourselves.
Have you ever found yourself reading the Word and then just going about your business and not reflecting on what you read (examining)? I'm letting you know this Blog is helping me in tremendous ways. I see and understand the scriptures more intently than I have in a long time. Jesus gives us a lot of information to process and he reveals it to us who have eyes to see and ears to hear.
The passage that talked to me the most today is as follows:
Matthew 20:8-16 (New International Version)
8"When evening came, the owner of the vineyard said to his foreman, 'Call the workers and pay them their wages, beginning with the last ones hired and going on to the first.'
9"The workers who were hired about the eleventh hour came and each received a denarius. 10So when those came who were hired first, they expected to receive more. But each one of them also received a denarius. 11When they received it, they began to grumble against the landowner. 12'These men who were hired last worked only one hour,' they said, 'and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the work and the heat of the day.'
13"But he answered one of them, 'Friend, I am not being unfair to you. Didn't you agree to work for a denarius? 14Take your pay and go. I want to give the man who was hired last the same as I gave you. 15Don't I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?'
16"So the last will be first, and the first will be last."
How much when I was employed, did I grumble about my wages? How much was I discouraged that I wasn't making the money that others were? How much complaining did I do inside, but on the outside everything was fine? How many times did I not work hard when God asked me too? Powerful thoughts and insight for going forward. I'm not saying that I was a hard worker, I am saying that there were times when I didn't give my Job the best that I should for various reasons. Remember this as you go to you place of employment and hold Gods words this morning close you tour heart!
~Talk to me~
Have you ever found yourself reading the Word and then just going about your business and not reflecting on what you read (examining)? I'm letting you know this Blog is helping me in tremendous ways. I see and understand the scriptures more intently than I have in a long time. Jesus gives us a lot of information to process and he reveals it to us who have eyes to see and ears to hear.
The passage that talked to me the most today is as follows:
Matthew 20:8-16 (New International Version)
8"When evening came, the owner of the vineyard said to his foreman, 'Call the workers and pay them their wages, beginning with the last ones hired and going on to the first.'
9"The workers who were hired about the eleventh hour came and each received a denarius. 10So when those came who were hired first, they expected to receive more. But each one of them also received a denarius. 11When they received it, they began to grumble against the landowner. 12'These men who were hired last worked only one hour,' they said, 'and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the work and the heat of the day.'
13"But he answered one of them, 'Friend, I am not being unfair to you. Didn't you agree to work for a denarius? 14Take your pay and go. I want to give the man who was hired last the same as I gave you. 15Don't I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?'
16"So the last will be first, and the first will be last."
How much when I was employed, did I grumble about my wages? How much was I discouraged that I wasn't making the money that others were? How much complaining did I do inside, but on the outside everything was fine? How many times did I not work hard when God asked me too? Powerful thoughts and insight for going forward. I'm not saying that I was a hard worker, I am saying that there were times when I didn't give my Job the best that I should for various reasons. Remember this as you go to you place of employment and hold Gods words this morning close you tour heart!
~Talk to me~
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Load Lifted
So, one of the thing I know I need right now is Faith. Faith comes from hearing/ Reading the word. And is shown by my actions. I hope that in sharing my thoughts with you all are a part of my actions of Faith. The scriptures are clear to me this morning and I am totally confident that when i Believe God that they will be fulfilled. I'm my prayer walk yesterday, as I was reflecting in prayer to God, I listened to the words that i was saying and noted that God has never let me down.
He never left me, nor did he let me off lightly. There was a lesson in everything that my family went through and we got through it. What is the next lesson for me and my family? We have to play out the scene in our movie to find out, but i know a few things. God is asking us to learn to be Humble, accept help, build a team around us and to be honest about our emotions and thoughts. To talk to each by asking true question and not superficial things and to PRAY, PRAY, PRAY.
In reading this morning here's what hit me the most:
Matthew 11:28-30 (New International Version)
28"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Burdened by life is nothing unusual to Jesus, he asks me to come to him to get rest. Not that I'm going to leave life alone and give up on doing anything, but that I'm not going to be oppressed by the weights that the world would say I should have on my shoulders in being in this spot. no depression, no Sadness, No hopelessness, no bitterness, no vision and most of all no JOY. We serve a God who is faithful and loves to take care of his children. I love the Lord!
~Talk to me~
He never left me, nor did he let me off lightly. There was a lesson in everything that my family went through and we got through it. What is the next lesson for me and my family? We have to play out the scene in our movie to find out, but i know a few things. God is asking us to learn to be Humble, accept help, build a team around us and to be honest about our emotions and thoughts. To talk to each by asking true question and not superficial things and to PRAY, PRAY, PRAY.
In reading this morning here's what hit me the most:
Matthew 11:28-30 (New International Version)
28"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Burdened by life is nothing unusual to Jesus, he asks me to come to him to get rest. Not that I'm going to leave life alone and give up on doing anything, but that I'm not going to be oppressed by the weights that the world would say I should have on my shoulders in being in this spot. no depression, no Sadness, No hopelessness, no bitterness, no vision and most of all no JOY. We serve a God who is faithful and loves to take care of his children. I love the Lord!
~Talk to me~
Monday, January 12, 2009
Examintation
Having a little more time on my hands these days, I and urged to look at myself in a way that I can't fully understand. I know that it's for my good but looking at the truths are Hard! I understand that I am an emotional person and that I have to decipher and separate my emotions from fact, but becoming aware of them makes a lot of areas in my life clearer.
I see that I posses an array of feelings that I suppress than deal with. One of them is sensuality, my senses become alive and energetic when something (traumatic) happens to me. I get the feeling of wanting acceptance in a physical way more easily than any other time. The touch of another person, the care in conversation, the willingness of someone to listen to me and just let me talk are more critical to my self worth than at any other time.
But even during this examination, something is lurking inside me that the scriptures pointed out to me this morning....
Matthew 9:4 (New International Version)
Knowing their thoughts, Jesus said, "Why do you entertain evil thoughts in your hearts?
My heart does this, my wife has pointed out to me over the past few days that I am expressing critical thoughts about the company that terminated me. And in my mind I'm just kidding but today I see that I am bitter and am entertaining evil thoughts. Going to church yesterday we saw a company truck and my heart got really hard and I wasn't thinking positive things about that company. It brought back the conversation in my mind of how the Lay-off took place and the thoughts that I had about people knowing that this was going to happen to me and not telling me in advance. WOW even writing this I see how my senses are coming alive again.
Pray for me to get rid of these evil thoughts.
~Talk to me~
I see that I posses an array of feelings that I suppress than deal with. One of them is sensuality, my senses become alive and energetic when something (traumatic) happens to me. I get the feeling of wanting acceptance in a physical way more easily than any other time. The touch of another person, the care in conversation, the willingness of someone to listen to me and just let me talk are more critical to my self worth than at any other time.
But even during this examination, something is lurking inside me that the scriptures pointed out to me this morning....
Matthew 9:4 (New International Version)
Knowing their thoughts, Jesus said, "Why do you entertain evil thoughts in your hearts?
My heart does this, my wife has pointed out to me over the past few days that I am expressing critical thoughts about the company that terminated me. And in my mind I'm just kidding but today I see that I am bitter and am entertaining evil thoughts. Going to church yesterday we saw a company truck and my heart got really hard and I wasn't thinking positive things about that company. It brought back the conversation in my mind of how the Lay-off took place and the thoughts that I had about people knowing that this was going to happen to me and not telling me in advance. WOW even writing this I see how my senses are coming alive again.
Pray for me to get rid of these evil thoughts.
~Talk to me~
Sunday, January 11, 2009
*Trust* Where is mine?
When i awoke this morning my head was filled with anxiety of things to do. What shall i wear, what's for breakfast, what time are we leaving to go to church, my youngest son was already awake and i needed to do something with him so he doesnt disturb me while i spend time with God and so the saga of clearing my mind continued to get more and more cluttered with each step i took. Then i was thinking i gotta have my coffee, where is my bible, should i go over the notes from the meeting yesterday or what should i read. Then the big question "What am i expecting from God today" when i read?
So a culmination of things got set in motion, i made coffee, grabbed a cup and got a few throw blankets, got my notes and my bible and started my time with God and the first thing i saw was the following passage.
Jeremiah 17:5-8 (New International Version)
5 This is what the LORD says: "Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who depends on flesh for his strength and whose heart turns away from the LORD. 6 He will be like a bush in the wastelands; he will not see prosperity when it comes. He will dwell in the parched places of the desert, in a salt land where no one lives. 7 "But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him. 8 He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit."
It just really helped me see this morning that God is asking me to trust in him and not in man. Again i 'm still battling the emotions of being out of work in this economy and fighting through the pressure of finding a Job and taking care of my family and then processing all the Love that is coming our way from the disciples. We (our Family) love each of you and Thank you.
The main point of all this is, when i decide to trust God, I have too because there is nothing else to trust. And he says when I do that....I will be like a tree planted by the Water, with DEEP ROOTS and not worrying about Droughts (times like these right now).
I love the God I serve and His son who gave me a chance to know him!
~Talk to me!~
So a culmination of things got set in motion, i made coffee, grabbed a cup and got a few throw blankets, got my notes and my bible and started my time with God and the first thing i saw was the following passage.
Jeremiah 17:5-8 (New International Version)
5 This is what the LORD says: "Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who depends on flesh for his strength and whose heart turns away from the LORD. 6 He will be like a bush in the wastelands; he will not see prosperity when it comes. He will dwell in the parched places of the desert, in a salt land where no one lives. 7 "But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him. 8 He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit."
It just really helped me see this morning that God is asking me to trust in him and not in man. Again i 'm still battling the emotions of being out of work in this economy and fighting through the pressure of finding a Job and taking care of my family and then processing all the Love that is coming our way from the disciples. We (our Family) love each of you and Thank you.
The main point of all this is, when i decide to trust God, I have too because there is nothing else to trust. And he says when I do that....I will be like a tree planted by the Water, with DEEP ROOTS and not worrying about Droughts (times like these right now).
I love the God I serve and His son who gave me a chance to know him!
~Talk to me!~
Friday, January 9, 2009
~God is Faithful~
When something hits you when you are not expecting it, what are you thougts?
I was laid of from my job and I remember having a few harsh thoughts towards the folks letting me know. I went through my emotions internally and I cried inside when I got the news, I was angry when I heard the words "no easy way to say it". I thought to myself OMG where is this coming from? I thought about how hard I work and the sacrafices that I make to go where they need me to go. And i thought how dare they treat me like this (more anger). The other thoughts I had were, this is a tough economy and where am i going to find a job that can satisfy my families needs? Who is going to hire an older guy like me in these times? How do i tell my wife? How do i talk to my kids? Do I tell other disciples? Where are you Lord and how did this happen to me, your faithful child?
After all these emotions hit, and after talking to a Few close disciples I asked my wife to go with me to prayer. We prayed and talked to God together and I have been praying what seems like non stop since I got the news. There are more things that transpired since then but I hope you have glimpse into my life.
I awoke this morning thinking I what to read? I need to study out trust, I need to think about Hope, i'm not going to read at all because I need to finalize my resume. But theni went to the Gateway and guess what I found? Just what God needed me to see:
1 Thessalonians 5:4-11 which reads:
4But you, brothers, are not in darkness so that this day should surprise you like a thief. 5You are all sons of the light and sons of the day. We do not belong to the night or to the darkness. 6So then, let us not be like others, who are asleep, but let us be alert and self-controlled. 7For those who sleep, sleep at night, and those who get drunk, get drunk at night. 8But since we belong to the day, let us be self-controlled, putting on faith and love as a breastplate, and the hope of salvation as a helmet. 9For God did not appoint us to suffer wrath but to receive salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ. 10He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him. 11Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
Then reading further I found this and will hold on to it:
1 Thessalonians 5:23-24
23May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. 24The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it.
~Talk to me~
I was laid of from my job and I remember having a few harsh thoughts towards the folks letting me know. I went through my emotions internally and I cried inside when I got the news, I was angry when I heard the words "no easy way to say it". I thought to myself OMG where is this coming from? I thought about how hard I work and the sacrafices that I make to go where they need me to go. And i thought how dare they treat me like this (more anger). The other thoughts I had were, this is a tough economy and where am i going to find a job that can satisfy my families needs? Who is going to hire an older guy like me in these times? How do i tell my wife? How do i talk to my kids? Do I tell other disciples? Where are you Lord and how did this happen to me, your faithful child?
After all these emotions hit, and after talking to a Few close disciples I asked my wife to go with me to prayer. We prayed and talked to God together and I have been praying what seems like non stop since I got the news. There are more things that transpired since then but I hope you have glimpse into my life.
I awoke this morning thinking I what to read? I need to study out trust, I need to think about Hope, i'm not going to read at all because I need to finalize my resume. But theni went to the Gateway and guess what I found? Just what God needed me to see:
1 Thessalonians 5:4-11 which reads:
4But you, brothers, are not in darkness so that this day should surprise you like a thief. 5You are all sons of the light and sons of the day. We do not belong to the night or to the darkness. 6So then, let us not be like others, who are asleep, but let us be alert and self-controlled. 7For those who sleep, sleep at night, and those who get drunk, get drunk at night. 8But since we belong to the day, let us be self-controlled, putting on faith and love as a breastplate, and the hope of salvation as a helmet. 9For God did not appoint us to suffer wrath but to receive salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ. 10He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him. 11Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
Then reading further I found this and will hold on to it:
1 Thessalonians 5:23-24
23May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. 24The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it.
~Talk to me~
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Contamination
~Do you drink poision and expect someone else to die?~
What a statement, as the scriptures state:
2 Corinthians 7:1
Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God.
Think of how many times we contaminate our faith and do things that we know we shouldn't. Or even in midst of doing something that we don't think is wrong, we get a feeling that it is but we continue to do it. Listed are some of the things I think of (you can list others):
-Watch movies that start off okay but then turn
-Listening to music that contain bad language or suggestive content
-Ask for advice just to ask and not follow
-Hold a grudge against anyone (disciple or not)
-Do half hearted reasearch on topics we need to cahnge
-Drive our vehicles too fast (75mph vs 65-70 (the law))
These things while they may not seem to contaminate us, eventually does.
Tell me your thoughts!
What a statement, as the scriptures state:
2 Corinthians 7:1
Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God.
Think of how many times we contaminate our faith and do things that we know we shouldn't. Or even in midst of doing something that we don't think is wrong, we get a feeling that it is but we continue to do it. Listed are some of the things I think of (you can list others):
-Watch movies that start off okay but then turn
-Listening to music that contain bad language or suggestive content
-Ask for advice just to ask and not follow
-Hold a grudge against anyone (disciple or not)
-Do half hearted reasearch on topics we need to cahnge
-Drive our vehicles too fast (75mph vs 65-70 (the law))
These things while they may not seem to contaminate us, eventually does.
Tell me your thoughts!
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
What does it mean?
1 Corinthians 13:11 (New International Version)
11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.
How is it that the scriptures address behavior's that we dont like to obey? As adults we tend to still act like children when things dont go our way . As followers of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, we have to be obedient to all the scriptures. What are you thoughts?
11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.
How is it that the scriptures address behavior's that we dont like to obey? As adults we tend to still act like children when things dont go our way . As followers of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, we have to be obedient to all the scriptures. What are you thoughts?
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